As you can see I still struggle with posting regularly or at all. I can’t even pin point the real problem with it – just everything is too much. It sounds weird – working from home I have gained extra time by not commuting, but somehow there seems to be even less time. During work-days most off my time is occupied with work, after that there is always too much to do outside. The joy of having a garden. And for a few months there is a dark era in here. Meaning the lights are out from 15 PM to 9 AM. And it’s cold!
My day-job is mostly “drawing and writing” (simplified description) so I tend to be out of words or ability to form them to sentences by the end of the day. I am not complaining – I love it! But I wish there were extra time between workdays for just my stuff. Without compromising things needed to be done at home or family time or sleep. Actually the last one gets reduced too often do get everything done.
Sure there are somethings that take more time here compared to the living in modern apartment. No running (and hot) water means every washing (dishes, laundry, shower) starts by carrying and heating water. Which also mean I don’t have automatic washers. Laundry is semi-automatic – I fill water and drain it between washing and rinsing. Dishes are done by hand – during winter in a bowl, during warmer time I can use a hose. In theory I could use the hose also during winter also, but taking it in and out every time would take even more time than carrying it out with a bucket. Oh, and there’s also the little thing that hose water is ice cold during winter so my fingers would probably freeze off or something. Not willing to test it.
Is there progress since 2023? Sure!
We have extra shelter outside were to store things that doesn’t need to be inside but at the same time are not very fond of water and snow. It even accommodates outdoor couch and table where we can eat or rest without the fear of rain.
We have a small cabin that started out as home-office for me, but right now is a bit cold to use for a sitting job – but I will be back there when it gets warmer. For now it is used by kids as private gaming room. They are more cold-resistant and there is a heater. I think we might need another one like this 🙂
We worked on our borehole to secure it for winter and prevent it from freezing this year, built a small insulated house around it. It looks really cute! This year we would like to move water pump in there which would make future water usage and new plumbing easier and safer.
We have insulated our bathroom cabin. Laundry dries quicker and it’s not so dreadful to take a shower. Even in colder days it was nice temperature inside even without extra heat blower.
Our future mini-house has a roof and at the moment is sealed with construction film to prevent weather damage until we can afford doing facade. Hopefully this year?
Last year we built a real greenhouse and I had a jungle of tomato, cayenne chill and bell pepper plants. Sadly I didn’t pick right variety for our conditions so the harvest wasn’t as I hoped. My outdoor tomato and cucumber plants got overheated and over-watered by the hectic weather and most died pretty early. Still not sure what went wrong with pumpkin-type ones, but I will try again this year. For the first time we had potatoes! And that wasn’t disappointing. We eat potatoes fairly often and our own lasted us for about 2-3 months. Sure, nice would have been more, but I understand that it’s kind of unrealistic to hope 50kg of potatoes while planting 5kg. Not sure how to measure what is the ratio, but we did get more than 5kg. And they are pretty independent plants compared to tomatoes 😀 From other veggies success was carrots, onions and almost garlic. I need a bigger veggie garden and a more though out strategy for others, something went totally wrong with salads. They didn’t grow enough and turned bitter.
We were literally drowning in apples! I made juice and jam, turned out pretty decent for a first timer. At the end of the summer we got a juicer which made the process a lot faster and easier and saved a lot of apples from rotting. Though to be honest there were way to many that went. I need find some good storing ideas. I don’t want to turn them all to jam and juice, but I haven’t found solution to store them otherwise. We don’t have a cellar or similar place with stable and dry temperature. I tried picking them gently and storing in a box so they could be eaten afterwards. They didn’t liked it. Maybe I should add food dehydrator to my shopping list?
Did we got where we hoped in 2024? No!
There are too many things that were out of our reach or control that affected all the plans. Fighting with old and new demons has taken a toll. It has taken financial and mental toll, but I haven’t lost hope – not completely at least. Sure there are better and darker days. And days when I just want to curl up in bed and hibernate until everything is over. But I know if I do that – it won’t be over, ever. So I breath, count the small wins and blessing and hope there won’t be new demons popping up, cause honestly I am not sure I can handle another one. But there are few demons less now then there were a year ago – that counts for something?
I did gained UX designer certification and have grown into new role (I had career switch in 2023) with confidence to make decisions and offer solutions. It feels good, to feel like I know what I am doing again. The transitions and learning curve has been easier than I thought and new team has been wonderful, and a real definition of teamwork.
Personally I have learned that some people are always keeping score while pretending to care and help. Just waiting for the right time to hurt you. But I also learned that there are people who don’t care at all. And that there are also people who just always offering to help without any strings, just enjoying helping out where they can. Who doesn’t look alternative meaning or agenda behind your every word and move.
I have also learned the true meaning of my gran-grans shared wisdom “Regret is useless”. Past is what molds the “present you”, you supposed learn from every experience whether the outcome was good or bad. And not every bad outcome is bad in long term. Regret doesn’t serve any purpose, it is just added weight in our mental health. Just like hate, anger, holding grudges. It doesn’t benefit you in anyway. It doesn’t harm others. For clearer comparison think about two questions:
1) How does it impact your life if someone hates* you?
2) How does it affect you, when you hate someone?
(NB! Don’t confuse this with peoples actions triggered by hate or anger! Actions are not feelings.)
What about 2025?
Honestly I don’t dare to make plans anymore. I have some wishes and hopes, that I don’t dare to speak out loud. Too many times has this ended badly, like someone had cursed those. Maybe there is.
If I am lucky – I will get around here more. Maybe the invisibility spell in social media wears off and my updates are seen again. And maybe there is some cake, ice cream and wine somewhere? Maybe the world settles and the news will be easier to read?
What about you?